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How To Get Your Girlfriend To Go Anal

For most people, anal sex is uncharted territory. You've most likely seen it first on the porn tapes your college buddies brought home, and this has been enhanced by whispers in bars and clubs. Whatever the reason you've been getting the idea in mind. The fact is that when asked, most men and some women will admit that even if they haven't tried this position, they are curious about it. But what's so great about anal sex, and how do you get your girlfriend to try it? How do you even begin to bring it up, and what are the important elements of the act that you need to know before you even try it?

What's so great about anal sex?

There's a chance that she won't want anything to do with letting you do her doggie style, but if she's into experimenting, she might want to know that it's a misconception that women can't enjoy anal sex because they have no prostrate. In fact, women have the same nerve endings in their anus as guys do, and share a very thin wall of tough skin with the vagina. They can enjoy it, but you have to do it right.

Another reason that women can enjoy anal sex is that they are as curious as you are as to how it feels. What was once considered taboo is now out in the open, and more women are discussing anal sex, so she might have heard stories from her girlfriends and be as curious to see how it feels as you are. Chances are that the few women that she's talked to about anal sex have warned her that it hurts. That's too bad - it means that the women discussing it didn't have a good experience, and unfortunately, most women don't. This is largely due to their boyfriends trying too hard, begging and whining, and so they've given in to this reluctantly, rather than agreeing to a mutual experiment. This puts the entire idea on an unsure footing to begin with, and ultimately ends up with hurt feelings, among other things.

The Taboo

Nice girls don't take it up the butt. Anal sex is dirty and the only ones who want it are guys that don't really care about you. These have been taboos for some time now. She's also probably a little apprehensive, as the rectum does not secrete fluids. If you go in dry you will really hurt her, remember. It's so tight back there for good reason - because the rectum's job is to hold excrement in, not just let it fall out. Also, it's scary; when women allow you to enter them from behind, they are turning all the sexual control over to you. It's hard to move and they can't see what you're doing back there. If you are as unpracticed at anal sex as she is, you could really hurt her by tearing the anal wall--these are all valid reasons why anal sex has remained on the taboo list.

So how do you go about it?

Slowly. Use lots of lubricant and insert your little finger until she's relaxed. Do everything you can to make sure that she is comfortable. Don't have her get on her knees; this causes the butt cheeks to involuntarily close. Instead, have her lean over a mound of pillows so that her cheeks naturally fall open. Massage the entire area with oils, and pay attention to her. Whisper to her, be reassuring. Going straight for the anus will scare her, causing her to flex the cheeks and tighten up. Maybe the first time you will only get to use your finger, but that's just the way it goes. If you do it right and are gentle, she will probably let you go further next time.

Always wear a condom and use lots of lubricant. A secret reason that women don't like anal sex is that they are mortified at the possibility of getting excrement on your penis, or simply letting loose. Intestinal gas, diarrhea, all of these things are pretty intimidating to your girl, so talk about it.

Remember that she's giving up sexual control by getting into this position, and the idea that she might embarrass herself makes it all the more stressful, and sex shouldn't be stressful, or an exclusive act preformed for one person's pleasure. A condom will ensure that nothing ends up on your skin that shouldn't, and it's a safe sex practice that shouldn't be ignored, anyway. And remember, never go straight from the anus to the vagina, condom or not, or you can cause an infection.

A word about pain

She knows that it's going to hurt, that's just part of the sex act that cannot be avoided. Now for some people, pain and pleasure are part of the excitement, so if she's into rougher sex to begin with and the two of you are comfortable with that, then anal sex is a natural next step, but if you're wanting to talk your sweet and somewhat shy girlfriend into anal sex, you might want to start out with a little pain/pleasure bondage to begin with to get her used to the idea. She may even realize that she likes it that way.

Start with some furry handcuffs; this will help her become used to giving up control in the bedroom. You can move onto any light bondage you wish. Light whips across the buttocks are also a form of bondage stimulation that can move her into the idea for anal sex. Furry handcuffs are a great way to begin to get her used to trusting you, and that is probably the most important aspect of good anal sex. It may take several sessions to get her relaxed and used to the idea of unusual sexual positions, so try some exotic or at least other positions than your "usual" first, as well. But remember, if she doesn't trust you, this is not going to be fun. Trust is the very best way to go about getting your girlfriend to take it in the rear.

Our recommendation:

Surprise your girlfriend with one of these and she will be more likely to try anal sex! :)

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